One of the nice things about managing a lot of men is that sometimes you can mess with them just for the hell of it. “Kelly, it’s Michael.” “What’s up?” “I wanted to tell you I’m working from home today. … Read More ›
Observations
Planning Ahead
“Pat, it’s Kelly.” “Hey, hon. What’s up?” “When I die I need you to be in charge of my funeral.” “Kelly, is there something you need to tell me?” “No, don’t be silly. I’m perfectly fine. But I had a… Read More ›
Privacy for a 3 1/2 Year Old
“Grandma, I have to poop!” “Well, let’s go to the bathroom.” “Grandma, you can’t stay in here. I need my PRIVACY!!!” “Oh, well, what if I turn around and don’t look?” “NO GRANDMA, I CAN DO THIS MYSELF, I NEED… Read More ›
Golf Lessons
4:00 pm Tuesday “Hi Dave, do you remember me?” “Yes, of course Kelly. Its been about 8 years, right?” “Yep.” “So why have you signed up for a golf lesson today?” “I have been invited to attend the mid Atlantic… Read More ›
Romance after 21 Years Part 2
Surrounded by the soft glow of candles, drinking a wonderful Zinfandel and feeling very romantic, I turn to my husband. “What are you thinking about, Bob?” “Kelly, I know you hope I’m thinking romantic thoughts. But men just aren’t that… Read More ›
Romance after 21 Years, Part 1
“Bob, do you notice anything different about me?” “I thought we agreed we’d never talk about your hair.” “I’m not talking about my hair, Bob. I’m talking about the 12 pounds I’ve lost. Didn’t you even notice?” “No I didn’t…. Read More ›
How I got dumped by my wrong number
Several years ago I was calling a woman at work and transposed the area code. Instead of dialing 301 (Maryland) I dialed 310 (Los Angeles). When a man answered the phone, I realized my mistake. “I’m sorry,” I said. “I’ve… Read More ›
Dear God,
You may have heard from me earlier today when I was in the grocery store. I pushed my cart past a man taking advantage of our 50 degree weather by wearing an extra small t-shirt that unfortunately did not cover… Read More ›
Botox Conversations
“Bob, I’m getting Botox.” “Why?” “For these two lines between my eyebrows.” “I wouldn’t worry about those, you can hardly see them. I’d worry about all those lines on your forehead.” “….<blink>….” “….<blink>….” “Are you trying to figure out how… Read More ›
Amie on the Potty
I know she’s going to hate me when she turns 17 but honestly, can you blame me?
Did I say that out loud? 